The Mother of All Cat Fights

Reblogged from Snide Reply:

There’s a really ugly battle going on, one that I witness every single day. It’s a battle that’s been going on for years, but seems to have gotten particularly evil recently. It’s not in Afghanistan, Pakistan or Syria. It’s right here in the United States. It’s the one between the least likely set of combatants: American moms.

Every single day lately, I hear something hateful come from the mouths (or computers) of moms.

Read more… 1,125 more words

If you're not following Snide Reply, start following her now! Ha ha! She writes like I will one day. Honest, in-your-face, tell-it-like-it-is writing that always makes me think. This blog is one of the best I've read yet. Enjoy!

bandia17 is now TwentyFiveEight

Never fear, loyal readers! You are still in the right place! I’m very pleased to welcome you to my newly named and updated blog. Take a look around and have fun. It’s still a work in progress, too, so expect a few new pages to pop up over the next few days or weeks.

I will get back to real blogging in a few days. Right now I’m having way too much fun getting this site just the way I want it.

Change is coming!!!

As promised in my last post, here are some of my ideas on what to re-name this blog. In no particular order….drum roll, please….

• Butterfly Effect–One small voice changing the world
• 25/8–The blog where there are 25 hours in a day and 8 days in a week
• Revolution–(no tag line yet)
• Figment of Your Imagination–Ideas so revolutionary, they may not be real

I like Butterfly Effect and Figment of Your Imagination the best right now. What about you guys?

The Balance Journey (Day 21)

In my Management class right now, we are discussing leadership and what makes a good leader and what organizations need from their leaders. One of the most important elements of being a good leader is the ability to create change; to challenge the broken systems and find better solutions to problems.

Our teacher made the comment that most people fear change and don’t ever want things to change, even if change is inevitable. My response to that is since change is inevitable, why not be the one making the change and then you are in more control of the situation. Of course, not everyone can do that.

Some people are too scared of being the first to do something. They want someone else to take that control and clear-cut a path through the forest. They want all the wild animals put in cages and a paved road. They want air-conditioned buildings. They want other people to kill their food.

Now, these are metaphors, not a critique of modern society. Although I do think we are very spoiled here in America and take it for granted. I think it speaks volumes that with all our technological advances, we still are dumbfounded about how the Egyptians built the pyramids.

So, long story short of that is, my next challenge will be to search for areas to change on top of continuing to find balance. Finding balance requires change anyway. Obviously, something was wrong if I felt out of balance in the first place. I will consciously search for areas to change and find new, creative ways to change. Whether those ideas work or not, I’ll try them. Every wrong way leads me closer to the right way.

Change number one is finding a better name for this blog. Just naming it after my favorite Irish word was okay when I was a new blogger and didn’t really know where this would end up but it’s time to grow and change. I’ll post some ideas in the next few days after I spend some time thinking about it but if you have any suggestions, I’m open to them.

Until next time, be the change you wish to see in your world.

The Balance Journey (Day 18)

Today was bad. Today was climb back into bed and start over bad.Today decided to knock me out in a one-two punch.

Today also taught me a valuable lesson on my journey.

“How?”, you might ask. Today reminded me that good days require bad days. Everything gets balanced. Everything! I’m learning that the hard way some days. Today felt a lot like the rainy day I wrote about a few days ago. Today was emotionally a very gray, cold, cloudy day. Which means that soon that emotional sun is going to come out and things will look brighter. It also means the emotional rain was something I needed to experience. I will grow from this experience.

Today was another stepping stone in my personal growth. I did have a meltdown. (I’m famous for meltdowns. I’m too high-strung and freak out over little things.) I had my pity party. Today’s pity party was drastically shorter than normal though.

I’ve read that it’s important to feel whatever it is that you’re feeling. Give those emotions the outlet they need.

As I was venting talking to my boyfriend, I realized some of what I was feeling was anger over the way I had been treated and grief that I had lost my faith and trust in the person who treated me so unjustly. And yes, I know, life isn’t fair. I don’t expect life to be fair, but I do expect other people to be fair. Sorry, soapbox moment, there.

Once I realized exactly why I was crying, it was so much easier to let the hurt and grief go away. Logic got to come to the party. Logic got to override my emotions and say that I know what the right response to the situation is. The right response is to choose to walk away.

You may think that’s drastic; you may not. But people who don’t know right from wrong are not people who should be in my life. I get the choice of who I associate with and I will not associate with liars and unethical people. You are who you associate with, and I do not want to be known as an unethical liar.

I want to leave you with a picture one of my Facebook friends recently posted. Be a light. Be different. Be change. I’ve posted it before, and it’s probably going to become my closing tag line but Gandhi’s quote is the best: Be the change you wish to see in the world.

 

The Balance Journey (Day 16)

I love, LOVE, LOVE personality tests. It’s probably because I’m INFJ.

(If you want to know your type, click here for a free, easy test based on Jung and Briggs-Meyers. HumanMetrics.com gives some brief information after you hit Submit but if you want more detailed information after you know your type, click here. PersonalityPage.com has links to all 16 personality combinations defined by Jung and Briggs-Meyers.)

Whenever I start feeling down about how I’m different then everyone else around me, I go back to PersonalityPage.com and read about INFJ’s.

INFJ’s make up only 1% of the population! No wonder I don’t know anyone else like me!

INFJ’s trust instinct above anything else. This one is the hardest for most people to understand. There have been many times where I couldn’t explain why I felt the way I did but it made perfect sense to me.

INFJ’s prefer autonomy and creativity at work. Yep, definitely me there. I hate when someone gives me a job and then stands over my shoulder and watches me do it. Just leave me alone and let me shine.

I love this list of common traits. This is a direct quote from PersonalityPage.com.

• Intuitively understand people and situations
• Idealistic
• Highly principled
• Complex and deep
• Natural leaders
• Sensitive and compassionate towards people
• Service-oriented
• Future-oriented
• Value deep, authentic relationships
• Reserved about expressing their true selves
• Dislike dealing with details unless they enhance or promote their vision
• Constantly seeking meaning and purpose in everything
• Creative and visionary
• Intense and tightly wound
• Can work logically and rationally – use their intuition to understand the goal and work backwards towards it

If you ever wanted to know me in a nutshell, there it is. Some of the traits in the list are obvious strengths. Some that look like weaknesses I have already learned how to turn into strengths. And then there are the ones that are obvious weaknesses and those are the ones I’m working on for the next 14 days and probably the rest of my life.

If you take the test, leave a comment and let me know your type. I’d love to know more about my readers.

Don’t be afraid to learn about yourself. You are amazing!

The Balance Journey (Day 13)

I’m finding it very hard to write right now because I’m fascinated by the rain falling. Most people find the rain depressing. It’s cold, wet, gray and cloudy and they just don’t like that.

I love the rain. I love the smell in the air while it’s falling. I love the whisper of a soft spring rain. I love the roar of a thunderstorm when it pounds on the walls, windows and ground. I love the cool breezes that come with the summer rains.

But what I love even more happens after the rain stops. The clouds part, the sun comes out and all the colors seem brighter. The grass and trees sparkle in the light. Everything grows a little faster (unfortunately, this means the weeds, too).

Nature shows us how important balance is. We wouldn’t have green, growing plants without rain. We couldn’t survive without water. We also can’t live without the sun.

I’m learning to love both sides of balance but in this case, the balance in nature is one of the most amazing things about our world.

A pit stop in the journey

Todays post has nothing to do with my recent posts on how I’m working for balance.

Todays post is a HUGE thank you, to you, my readers and followers. I’ve been blogging for almost a year (and hoped I would get some readers) but this has mostly been an outlet for me. I’m very happy to see other people getting something out of my writing.

I always love reading other blogs here on WordPress because I see so much goodness in the world. People don’t seem to abuse each other here. I see respect and openness. I see humor, caring, compassion and love. I feel so honored to be a part of this community.

Thank you for letting me share my life and story with you. Thank you for sharing your lives and stories with me and the rest of the world. Make your voice count everyday. You are the only you there ever will be. Take control and be proud of who you are.

The Balance Journey (Day 11)

Almost half way through my first 30 days of making conscious choices. I feel like I am doing better but I still have some areas where I know I need a little more work.

I still need to find a way to nurture my spiritual side. I think that’s where I’m still the weakest. Usually, getting outside or even just opening the windows in the apartment will revitalize me but this week it isn’t working. I’ve taken enough Psych to know there’s probably something else going on but I’m not sure what.

Physically, I need to schedule exercise better. I have my one yoga day but I also need to do cardio one day and weights one day. I’ve stopped drinking milk, not because I’m allergic but because as a Blood Type A I’m not supposed to drink cow milk. I’m supposed to drink goat milk, soy milk, almond milk or rice milk. I know I’m not getting enough calcium this way because my bones ache a lot, especially my hips and pelvis. I have to get that fixed.

Mentally is where I’m strongest. I’m constantly learning new things. I have realized that I need to figure out what I’m going to do to keep my brain sharp after I graduate with my Associates on June 16. (YAY!!!) I have continuing education that I need to complete to renew my insurance license next year but I also have to decide if I’m going to go to a 4-year school for my Bachelors or not.

Emotionally, I am doing much better about controlling my emotions and not letting them control me. I have stopped myself numerous times over the past 11 days and logically thought about what was going on instead of reacting illogically and emotionally. It’s been revealing to see how wrong my thought patterns have been. The hardest part so far is unlearning all the bad emotional habits.

 P.S. This is my 35th post. Just thought that was a fun little random fact.

The Balance Journey (Day 4)

I had the opportunity this morning to say some things I had been afraid to say. It took more courage than I thought I had. Much to my surprise, the other person (my boss) accepted my point of view and made the comment that what I said had never been explained in that way before and made a lot of sense. I made a difference today in how the rest of the team will be treated from here on out.

The long and short of the issue is that there really is no “I” in “Team” but when the team is forced to compete against each other, then that places an “I” in “Team” which doesn’t help the team in any way, shape, or form. I called the entire team on it but especially our boss. I told her I felt some of the reason she isn’t seeing the passion, drive and cooperation from us that she wants to see is because we don’t know what she wants. Are we working together today or are we working against each other today? Can we depend on each other or not? Are we “I” or “Team”?

Please don’t think I’m against competition. One team against another creates great competition. It encourages you to do your best work. But competition inside the team can only lead to destruction. You don’t know who to trust or what to believe. I spoke up against that, not competition on the whole.

I feel empowered for using my voice the way I wanted to use my voice. I had something to say that I needed to say and I said it. I didn’t swallow it and hope someone else would see the injustice and fix it. I did it myself.

As Gandhi said, “Be the change you wish to see in the world.”