The Balance Journey (Day 13)

I’m finding it very hard to write right now because I’m fascinated by the rain falling. Most people find the rain depressing. It’s cold, wet, gray and cloudy and they just don’t like that.

I love the rain. I love the smell in the air while it’s falling. I love the whisper of a soft spring rain. I love the roar of a thunderstorm when it pounds on the walls, windows and ground. I love the cool breezes that come with the summer rains.

But what I love even more happens after the rain stops. The clouds part, the sun comes out and all the colors seem brighter. The grass and trees sparkle in the light. Everything grows a little faster (unfortunately, this means the weeds, too).

Nature shows us how important balance is. We wouldn’t have green, growing plants without rain. We couldn’t survive without water. We also can’t live without the sun.

I’m learning to love both sides of balance but in this case, the balance in nature is one of the most amazing things about our world.

A pit stop in the journey

Todays post has nothing to do with my recent posts on how I’m working for balance.

Todays post is a HUGE thank you, to you, my readers and followers. I’ve been blogging for almost a year (and hoped I would get some readers) but this has mostly been an outlet for me. I’m very happy to see other people getting something out of my writing.

I always love reading other blogs here on WordPress because I see so much goodness in the world. People don’t seem to abuse each other here. I see respect and openness. I see humor, caring, compassion and love. I feel so honored to be a part of this community.

Thank you for letting me share my life and story with you. Thank you for sharing your lives and stories with me and the rest of the world. Make your voice count everyday. You are the only you there ever will be. Take control and be proud of who you are.

Finding my balance

Many cultures believe in the duality of life. Right and wrong, yin and yang, male and female just to name a few. American culture, for whatever reason, seems to ignore this basic fact.

In America, we must be exceptional at one thing. You can’t be pretty and smart. You can’t be a nerd and cool. You can’t be a worker and a parent. We are not taught to value or achieve any kind of balance. Everything we are taught says only do that one thing that is the most important. If you have to do more than one important something, you probably won’t be able to give your best effort to everything.

I say screw that!

I’m tired of being tired and stretched in a million different directions. I’m tired of hearing I can’t live my life in the way that makes sense to me.

I am in control of me, not anyone else. I control what I want from my life. I control the experiences I have. I control my responses. I control my fears. I control my hopes and dreams. I control myself.

“They” are not me. “They” don’t know what’s best for me. “They” aren’t introverts. “They” don’t value honesty, integrity, family, peace, communication, listening.

I’m not trying to offend anyone. This post is not directed at anyone who normally reads this. This is word vomit for myself so I see it in writing and can come back and re-read my own words. But this has been on my mind for a couple of weeks now, so maybe I’m not the only one who needs to hear it.

I need to say no when I know I can’t do something. I need to schedule time for myself to recuperate and relax. I need to spend time each day outside. I need to exercise at least every other day. I need to stop being afraid of strangers. I need to speak my mind more often.

I’ve made a commitment to myself to begin to find my balance. Over the next 30 days, I will make conscious choices and write about my journey. I don’t expect to be completely balanced in 30 days but I do know I won’t get anywhere if I don’t start tracking and monitoring what is going on in my life. I have to start paying attention to how I live and stop acting like a victim. Life didn’t happen to me, I happened to Life. I affect Life, not the other way around.

One little bite at a time and soon I’ll have the whole elephant eaten.

Life lesson from my cats

I had an epiphany this morning cleaning out my cat’s litter box.

Wait! Don’t go yet! I promise it’s worth it!

It stuck me this morning that there are a lot of crappy things in my life that I don’t speak up about. Things I’m not happy with and just refuse to admit, both to myself and the people who may be a part of the situation. And not dealing with it is a lot like my cats burying their poop. I know for them it’s instinctual and they are just trying to bury it as if they were going to the bathroom outside, but I have to come behind them and dig it out and throw it away so my house doesn’t stink like poop.

I know, gross, right?

Here’s where it gets cool…The junk in my life I’m not dealing with is like that junk in the litter box. If I DON’T dig it up, it’s gonna make my life continue to stink. Burying it is not helping. I HAVE to expose it to get rid of it and make my life better.

Now comes the hard part of having an epiphany. Can I put it into action? Here’s hoping I can because I have some junk in my life I really need to dig up and throw away. My life could “smell” a lot better than it does and it’s up to me to clean it up. No one else is gonna come behind me and clean up my messes.

I’ll keep you posted on my progress but until then remember to be kind to each other because we are all related.

Much love, Bandia